So those words sound very scary, but as surrogate, I have heard them a LOT. It seems as soon as you mention bleeding on a surrogacy board, at least a few of the responses involve these words along with reassurances that the baby or babies were born just fine. So, it may or may not make sense that when I started bleeding at around 8:45 last night, I almost prayed to hear those words, because the alternative word would have been "miscarriage".
I saw the bright red blood and we immediately left for the ER. I know they couldn't do anything for me if it was a miscarriage, but I also knew that if I were an intended parent, I would want to know that my surrogate did everything in her power to keep the babies going. My hospital got me in pretty quickly and monitored for heartbeats. There were two, and they were strong. I heaved a sigh of relief and then waited to hear the verdict.
At that time, the verdict was "go home and follow up at your doctor's office tomorrow."
I happened to have an appointment already scheduled for the morning, so I went home, got some sleep, and went in hoping for some answers. At my Ob Gyn's office, we have the absolute BEST sonographer I have ever had the pleasure of working with. She takes her time, explains everything, and is simply pleasant.
She was able to locate the heartbeats and determine that the babies were still doing well. She also was able to locate the subchorionic bleed which was located just inside the cervix, and far away from the placenta, which is the best possible place for it to be (far, far away from the placenta.) It looks like we might have a little more bleeding before all is said and done. The next thing she was able to do was INSTANTLY determine the gender of each baby.
I sent the parents some flowers today that are color coded with notes to give them their news. I had to go with flowers because anything else would have taken too long to get to them. I have received word that the flowers have been delivered. Once it has been confirmed that they got them, I will post it here on my blog first. I just want to give them the respect of not having 50 people know before they even have a chance to process the information. (If there are even 50 of you out there? lol)
Anyway, the bleeding seems to have stopped. I am feeling some random little movements in there, and I am satisfying my current craving for oreos and milk. Back to school work I go. :)
First- I notice that even though my belly is still not quite to baby bump level, I am already walking like a penguin. This happened with my last pregnancy as well. I think my hips just feel the growth and turn into rubber instantly. It has caused a tiny bit of lower back discomfort, which I am certain will become pain later. It is nothing I haven't been through before, so I am prepared for it.
These little ones are starting to get bones now. This probably explains why I want whole milk ALL THE TIME. Every time I get thirsty I reach for milk. I have had to force myself to drink more water unless I am outside in the heat. They are about 5 inches long now, and given that my belly really hasn't gotten much bigger than before, that may explain why I occasionally feel Baby B (the one on top) moving. It has been a rare occurrence, maybe once every other day for the past week, but I know the feeling. It's pretty cool.
My cravings, aside from milk, include avocados, berries, and turkey sandwiches with miracle whip.
My symptoms include occasional headaches, some leg cramps if I don't drink enough water, heartburn, and going to the bathroom a lot at night. I also have been having more dreams, though I can't remember them.
I really do not feel pregnant. It feels weird to even say I am pregnant to people.
I will say that I have had great fun messing with people now that my belly does stick out a little. I do enjoy seeing peoples expressions when I say "yes, I am pregnant, but they aren't mine"
They give me a confused look to which I respond, "well you see, they're Chinese"
Another confused look. After which I explain that I am a surrogate. I also have been known to tell people I am pregnant but not keeping them because they are not my husband's. That gets some interesting responses as well.
I have to be able to have some fun with this, right?
I did get to have lunch with the intended mother last week when I visited Philadelphia for the Queen + Adam Lambert concert (which was OMG AMAZING). It was really very nice to get to see her and catch up since we don't get to see each other very often. The greatest part about this meeting is I was given permission to find out the babies genders if possible at our next ultrasound (Monday the 28th). I did not know if they'd want me to find out since they could not be there. I am excited that I might get to be the one to relay the news to them. It could go either way at 18 weeks whether the sonographer can figure out their genders, but I am crossing my fingers that the little ones will cooperate.
Again, I cannot express my gratitude enough to Tina and The Surrogacy Experience for handling all of the business aspect of this journey as well as matching me to such a wonderful couple. I have been hearing of some other journeys that are not as smooth lately, and it reminds me over and again how incredibly lucky I am to be where I am. If I do decide to complete another journey I will, without a doubt, choose to continue with the same agency.
Oh this experience thus far has been so wonderful. My intended parents are simply the sweetest and most generous IPs. I never would have expected the match to be this great. I posted on facebook, but I received a package in the mail full of Burt's Bees products. I have never tried their skin care line. I must say, I love it. This is really just one of the many nice things they have done. I don't even want to list some of the others. I'd feel braggy. Since I am well into the second trimester now, I am feeling great and it's almost not like work at all, so I don't feel I deserve to be so spoiled. I am not complaining at all. It really just helps make me feel even more secure in this decision and in them as my match. I don't know how I got so lucky. I am just glad.
Symptoms right now:
- some headaches in the evening
-hunger- either I want to eat everything in sight or absolutely nothing sounds good.
-it is getting slightly uncomfortable to sleep because I either need to go pee or I have heartburn
-cravings- they change every day. right now I want fried eggs with toast and a peanut butter milkshake.
In other news: My husband is amazing.
For every craving I have had or every nap I have needed in the middle of the day he has been understanding. He is just as perfect now as when I was pregnant with his own baby, which is far better than I expected. He agreed to this journey as much as I did, but the true test was when I started putting Popsicles, kosher dill pickles, and a few other odd things in the cart and he just went along with it. He also has gone downstairs to get me pickles on several occasions when I wanted them. Once again, I find myself astounded at my luck.
As far as the babies, I have felt a few flutters, but I am never quite sure if they are babies moving or my stomach acting up. The babies will be about the size of avocados by Tuesday. Our next ultrasound isn't until the 28th so we have a little bit of time before I get to see them again. This one is just to check cervical length to make sure it's enough to hold these babies in long enough.
I do have a sight baby bump now, but some of the bump is really just leftover chub, so I feel like it's cheating to post a cute belly picture now. Maybe I will get one later. :)
I have no concerns or worries. I am a textbook pregnant- even with twins apparently.